How to have difficult conversations

Know the one thing you need to say, open with a simple invitation to talk, and listen more than you rehearse.

Before a hard conversation, the mind plays both sides. It writes their lines, usually the worst version, and then argues with them. By the time you actually talk, you're exhausted and defensive.

You don't need a script. You need one clear thing you want to say, and the willingness to hear the other person. Everything else can happen in the moment.

Starting is often the hardest part. A simple opener lowers the stakes for both of you: "Do you have ten minutes? I'd like to talk about something."

Once you're in it, listen to understand, not to prepare your reply. Silence is fine. Reflecting back what you heard before you respond changes most conversations.

Try this · 2 minutes

One thing

1.Write the single most important thing you need them to hear. One sentence.
2.Write one question you genuinely want answered.
3.Notice the lines you've written for them in your head. Set them aside; they haven't said anything yet.
4.Bring the actual person to mind, not the imagined argument.

Send one line: “Do you have ten minutes today? I'd like to talk.”

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KAROTI offers practical ideas, not medical or mental-health treatment. If you're struggling, please talk to a qualified professional or someone you trust.